Chelsey Seidel.

Today, my sister, Chelsey, graduates from college. AKA, she becomes a real person in the real world. Today she steps away from the comforts of college, such as: no one judging you for being just a little overweight, day-drinking without it interfering with your keeping a job, and my personal favorite- the wearing of yoga-pants on the regular. Today, Chelsey steps into the great unknown…

I’ve known Chelsey for a little over 20 years now and she’s taught me a lot, to say the least. For those of you who have never had the privilege of speaking with this bundle of knowledge, throughout this post I will share the things I have learned from her insightful mind over the years. 

-Contrary to popular belief, eating Taco-Bell 17 times a week throughout your whole college career won’t even kill you.

-How to properly ruin a surprise party. For example- running into the house and screaming “SHE’S HERE! HIDE!!” only to find out it’s the wrong house.

-How NOT to tell my parents about belly-button piercings. 

-How to convince my siblings I am running away from home.

-How to come up with time consuming games such as “let’s guess which house is secretly a meth lab.”

-How to entertain yourself while hunting.

-How to deflect the attention from you, after you push your little sibling down by saying things like, “are you ok??! what happened?!!!”

-How NOT to act in choir class. Luke Michalski also helped with this. But we’ll have a post about him another day.

For these things and so many more, thank you, Chelsey, for teaching me right.

Happy Graduation Day.

Everybody’s Got A Story…

She had a couple different daddys

Never made her mamma happy

and her skinny little sister got all the attention

so she slept with half the town

and when the gossip got around that she was fast

she blamed it on her past                                                                                                                          

We all got our issues 

a lot of shit we gotta get through

a dozen different reasons to fall apart

so before you start that “poor me”

everybody’s got a story that’ll break your heart                                                                                 

you blame the drinking on your childhood

blame the school cause you don’t talk good

blame the drive thru for the weight gain, your hot temper on your last name

you blame your ex for your divorce 

and the judge for the child support you’ve gotta pay

and you’d blame God if you prayed                                                                                                

We all got our issues 

a lot of shit we gotta get through

a dozen different reasons to fall apart

so before you start that “poor me”

everybody’s got a story that’ll break your heart

-KM

The Cabin.

The day after Christmas, my father, sister, brother, and I headed to my cousin’s hunting cabin. This cozy cabin is nestled in the country between a wonderfully scented hog farm, a swamp, and woods. There are no stoplights and the only place to eat out is the R-Mart ten minutes down the street. A prime spot to experience the local flavor.

The “Cabin Experience” always begins with the ride out to Duplin County. In order to keep all those in the car as entertained as possible, we play games such as “I spy the graveyard” and “guess which house is secretly a Meth Lab.” I usually win the graveyard game, but my sister Chelsey is strangely good at the Meth Lab game. For those of you who have never ventured out past Mt. Olive, Meth labs run rampant. Hence the signs that read “Meth=Death” and “Jesus hates Meth.”

We finally arrived at the Cabin. Soon enough 3:15 rolled around. Time to hunt. It was my turn to be the designated shooter. So my sister, father, and I- accompanied by a 230PVYT657 shotgun (Clearly I do not remember the correct name for the gun, but let’s be real- who cares. It shoots.) climbed into the two-person deer stand. 

For those of you that have never experienced the thrill of the hunt, let me enlighten you on the process. For the first thirty minutes you are alert and your senses are keen. Then, you get bored and your mind starts to play cruel tricks. Things such as “Is that a bunny or a log?” come out of your sister’s mouth and you begin to seriously regret your decision to ever invite her hunting. Then your father tries to teach you things about deer, such as “deer don’t have any natural enemies. Except for the automobile, of course.”….Dad, what are you even saying?…After a while you really start to go insane. You start comparing the hunt to Mass. “We’ve been in the deer stand so long we would have reached the Homily for sure….Now we would have made it to the consecration.”…My sister is never hunting with me again.

Remember that time Gavin Degraw bought me a hammock?

Yesterday I went mitten shopping with Gavin Degraw at the Mast General Store. Not gloves, mittens. Don’t get them confused, I made that mistake once. 

Gavin, Katie, and I walked around the store as he meticulously looked at every item on every shelf. Then, we came across the ENO hammocks. He was fascinated by them. I told him they were the bomb.com. Then he asked why we didn’t have one. We said we were poor….Then he told us he was rich. I repeat, he made an “I’m rich” joke about himself. 

He decided he was going to buy us each a hammock. I told him there was no way I was letting him buy me a hammock, he asked what I was going to do to stop him…..My new hammock is gray and orange. 

Let’s review everything Gavin bought….An ENO hammock, a duffel bag/backpack, and a knife-fork-spoon combo tool. But don’t be fooled- he only camps if it is in his back yard. 

Gavin is the nicest, funniest, most talented person I have ever met and I am so happy I had the opportunity to mitten shop with him…..

The first act of the night was Carolina Liar. I was watching the show from back stage when all the stage hands started getting on their walkie-talkies and got super sketch. I just kept hearing the phrase “she’s here, she will be walking in shortly.” I had NO idea who “she” was, but apparently “she” was quite the important person. 

I turned to the staff member in charge of my club and asked him who was coming. He looked around at my peers and said “should we tell her?” I have never been so confused in my whole life. He then opened his mouth and said the words I have waited to hear my whole life…”Carrie Underwood just arrived.” I could feel the tears forming in my eyes…partially because she is one of my favorite artists of all time, partially because I would get to see her hot legs in person, partially because they were correct about not telling me she was coming, out of fear that I would cry.

We lined up along the wall, obviously I was the only one shaking like a leaf….but she never walked by. What a tease, Carrie. Way to screw with my emotions. Such a heartbreaker. 

Minutes later, as I walked backstage to watch some of David Cook’s set, Whitney grabbed my arm. She told me I wasn’t allowed to freak out but to look on the other side of the curtain hanging beside us. I stepped forward to take a peek and there she was. Blonde hair, hot legs, and all……I was sure I was dead. She was right there. RIGHT THERE. We both sang along to “Light On” as David Cook’s band played…AKA- I sang with Carrie Underwood last night.

Moral of the story is…Gavin likes mittens, not gloves.

Hipsters.

Hipsters. Don’t know what a hipster is? Here you go…

Those bearded, barefoot boys in the corner of the coffee shop on their MacBooks. Online shopping in the infant section of Urban Outfitters for more of those snazzy snug tank tops they love so much…One time you handed them the change from the coffee you bought, because you believed them to be homeless…No worries. We’ve all made that mistake once or twice.

Let’s begin with their fashion choices…Shoes. Please, just start wearing them. Moving on. Unbuttoned flannel shirts, exposing the hair sprouting from your un-fit chest. The buttons are there for a reason, use them. Capris. Boys, capris aren’t even in style for girls anymore. Zac Effron made that mistake once, and I bet he regrets it. American Apparel is an expensive store. We all know you have money. Please stop spending so much money, time, and effort to look so poor.

Let’s now turn to a hipster’s inner-most-thoughts. We all know they spend hours online looking for the most outlandish and hard-to-understand metaphors, hoping to out-hipster their buddies. But saying things like, “my spirit comes alive as poison in your veins,” just confuses everyone. Please speak English.

As for music…I know you hate the radio and everything it stands for, but have you heard Justin Bieber’s new song? It’s kinda catchy. And I know you found that band long before anyone else did…but it doesn’t mean you have to throw their album out, now that they’re popular.

To wrap this little blog post up, let me just say that I’ve never seen people dress and act so similar to one another, while claiming to be so unique and different.

Easy.

I’ll skip polite formalities

Pass up all the pleasantries

No, I won’t wear a smile just to save my face

I don’t wanna know what you’re thinking about

Truth is, I don’t care what you’re doing now

And I hate being rude, but I sure as hell won’t apologize to you


I don’t wanna know what her name is

I don’t wanna hear you justify to me

And I don’t wanna know if she makes you happy

Cause you took my heart and wrecked it completely

I just wanna know how you made it look so easy


I won’t small talk for the hell of it

While you ignore the elephant

That’s crashing ‘round the room

Don’t push aside all you put me through


I don’t wanna know what her name is

I don’t wanna hear you justify to me

I don’t wanna know if she makes you happy

Cause you took my heart and wrecked it completely

I just wanna know how you made it look so easy


How’d you walk away

Not even blink an eye

Like it didn’t even hurt to say goodbye


I don’t wanna know what her name is

I don’t wanna hear you justify to me

I don’t wanna know if she makes you happy

Cause you took my heart and wrecked it completely

I just wanna know how you made it look so easy

I just wanna know how you made it look so easy

Liz H.

Dear Boone,

As I sit here on my bed, looking out at the mountain right next to my window, my eyes can’t help but tear up. I will miss this view more than anything. 

This is my last night in Boone. Yes, I will come back to visit. Yes, I will always have friends here. But never again will I live in a place where the beautiful Carolina mountains are right outside my window. 

This year and a half spent at Appalachian State has taught me more than I could have ever imagined. I have learned more about myself and others than I ever thought possible. I have learned some lessons the hard way and I have learned other lessons too late. But I would not trade these lessons for anything. 

The people that have influenced me while at ASU will forever be remembered. Every person that has become my friend, wished me luck in Nashville, or even smiled at me on campus, I love all of you and your kind words and encouragement are what made this decision so easy, yet hard to make at the same time.

Someone asked me yesterday, “Why did you bother coming to App at all if you were just going to leave not even halfway through your college career?” 

Well…I have loved every second of being at App. I cannot see myself going to school anywhere else. I have loved college. And I am so happy and blessed to have experienced it the way that only Appalachian State can offer. BUT I love music more. 

I can’t expect you to understand, unless you share my passion. There is no better feeling than when I create and play music. That is something I am unable to do to my fullest potential here in Boone…

So thank you. Thank you for making this decision easy with your encouraging words. And more importantly, thank you for making my decision hard, by being the most amazing town ever.

Things I am Thankful for…..

I am watching my fifth episode of Criminal Minds, so far today. I am so scared. But I cannot stop watching it.

Thanksgiving was great. I traveled with my family to Pittsburgh. While in Pittsburgh I compiled just a small list of things I am thankful for.

-The tight pants football players have to wear.

-Criminal Minds. 

-Jersey Shore.

-Kaitlyn Hammond’s jokes.

-People who are fatter than me.

-My dogs.

I could go on for hours……

When I got back to Charlotte yesterday, I made my daily Wal*Mart run. While looking at the five dollar sweatshirts, I ran into my friend, Allison. Her eardrum ruptured, so she was getting her medication…I also made her walk around and shop with me. 

I was getting my dorm room necessities for these last three weeks of the semester…ya know- a family size box of Cheez-Its, Diet Coke…However, when we reached the soda isle, a new product caught my eye. It was called “Dr. Pepper 10”. Sounded just fascinating. 

As I stepped closer to get a better view of the Dr. Pepper, Allison stopped me. “NO! That’s just for boys! Haven’t you been keeping up with TV commercials?!” I was just so confused. “If you bring that to the register they will never let you buy it.” …I had no idea what she was talking about, but she’d been a pretty reliable friend up to this point so I thought I’d trust her. Good thing I did. She showed me this tonight……

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3iuG1OpnHP8

#CMAawards.

This morning, I discovered that my internal clock has not had Daylight Savings yet, waking me up an hour too early. 

Last night, the Country Music Association Awards took place in Nashville. In order to prepare for the three hour show, I got a box of tissues and got beneath my covers…because I cry the whole time. I told several people this yesterday, assuming it was an emotional time for everyone, they looked at me like I was crazy. They asked me why I cry and I didn’t really know how to respond. I guess watching people receive awards just makes me really vulnerable. Who knows….

Let’s review the show. Carrie and Brad hosted. They were hilarious. They made Tim and Faith dolls make out on stage, they had Little Jimmy Dickens dress up as Justin Bieber, which let’s be real, was the best moment of my life. 

The Band Perry was rockin’, winning most of the awards they were nominated for. Then they performed….All I have to say is, what was going on with her hand? Was that sexy? Was she having a seizure? Halfway through the performance I was expecting a medic to come on stage and check on her. Speaking of awkward performers, did anyone see Matt Nathanson with Sugarland? Was there a reason for him standing like he was attempting to do the splits but failing miserably? I was just so confused the whole time. 

Let’s take a break from the music to acknowledge the award that SHOULD have been handed out, but was so sadly overlooked. Carrie Underwood’s legs deserve a moment of silence. She has some banging legs. 

Blake Shelton and wife Miranda Lambert were recognized as male and female vocalists of the year. All I have to say about that one is that it took long enough. Not only is Blake recognized for being a drunk- hot mess- with great tweets, he is now recognized as the great vocalist that he is. Miranda is just so sassy and intimidatingly awesome- so it’s no wonder she got the award.

Eric Church was once again nominated for New Artist of the Year…only took him three albums to get there…He lost, but I’m still proud to be his fellow mountaineer. Anyone who can wear sunglasses inside and not look like a blind man is a winner in my book. 

Taylor Swift won entertainer of the year. It was well deserved whether you love or hate her. She had a sold out world tour. And she has great hair, something Brad Paisley can unfortunately never live up to. I also loved her performance, I have missed envying that guitar. 

So many unanswered questions from last night, but I still loved every single second of the show. Can’t wait to cry my eyes out again next year.